80's hair

Quick race review PREVIEW:

(and reason 13,847 why I love my boyfriend, as he created this comparison)

To run 26.2 or not to run 26.2, that is the question

Tomorrow is the St Jude Memphis (Half) Marathon.

THE FACTS:

Last year, I ran the full marathon (my first!).

This year, I registered for the full marathon.

Last year, I was hurt and 2 months out of training due to my stupid ankles.

This year, I am 2 months out of training because I am a lazy piece of poo.

Last year, it was blazing hot.

This year, it is supposed to be much cooler.

So the question becomes:

Do I run the FULL marathon? Or cash in my pride and duck out at the HALF split?

My plan right now is to stick with the half. I cannot change my registration, but I am allowed to take a right at mile 12 rather than a left, save my legs an additional 13.1 miles, and still get a medal. (The woman at the information desk continues by saying, "But you will not qualify for any awards." Upon which I laugh out loud.)

BUT, and that's a big but (not to be confused with a big butt), what if I am feeling "optimistic" at mile 12? Do I keep going? Do I risk it? A potential injury or DNF? Decisions, decisions.

I feel like a cheater, because my shirt says MARATHON and my bib says MARATHON- am I a lier if I wear my shirt in a few days and people are all like "Whoa, you ran a marathon?!" and I am all "Umm, well, no, but, I registered for one!" Sorry, registering doesn't count. Silly detail, but remember: my mind is a very strange place to live.

If I had to put money down right now, I would say I do the HALF. I am 99.9% sure I will do a half. I will suppress that .1% that is crossing its arms, squinting at me, and saying "You SUCK, ya know that?!" and hold my head high as I cross the 13.1 finish line. Because while part of me may scream FAILURE, another part of me is like YOU JUST RAN A HALF MARATHON, AND THAT IS STILL PRETTY BAD ASS!

BTW. Check out my bib:

SCHECKY! Yea buddy!

Story: One day while out shopping with Kevin, we saw these pens-

You see there? You see the 2nd one down? Shecky The Clown? Yea, that is AWESOME. So now, my loving boyfriend has adopted SCHECKY THE CLOWN as one of my many nicknames. I love it.

Blogger FAIL leads to LESSON LEARNED

One of my running friends made a joke that I should rename my blog to "Still Learning to Blog." I was all like "No, I am just busy, I... No, I just have a lot going on... right now... Lot's to do... Things and... stuff... and... dammit, you're right."

Hi, my name is Amy Mary, and I am a blogging FAILURE.

But, to be honest (no, not just making excuses here...), I have not been running. Like, at all. I think I have gone on maybe 4 runs since the Chicago Marathon (which was nearly 2 months ago!), with the longest being 10k. So I felt I had nothing to write about. But really, in hindsight, I probably should have kept writing- it was exactly what I NEEDED to be doing. Perhaps it would have helped me through my running funk/ slump/ rut/ whatever you want to call it. And, more importantly, it may have helped other runners out there in the same predicament.

There are a few runners I have met (or followed on twitter, read their blogs, etc) that run religiously. I have never heard of them hitting a wall, wanting a weekend off, or just plain needing a break. They just run. Constantly. And don't complain. At all. But, to be fair, a lot of those people are elite athletes who have spent years and years and years dedicated to running and have built it into their life. I am definitely still a running newbie. Two years of neat new clothing, medals, shoes, and poop issues does not an elite runner make. While I love running, I also love my life. I love lazy Saturday mornings sleeping in, making pancakes, and watching sports with Kevin (vs waking up at 6am to run 16 miles). I love going out for a drink with the girls after work (vs heading straight home and knocking out a 6 miler). I love being able to wear high heels to work and not worry about being sore. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE RUNNING, but I am also a 29 year old girl (not woman, that makes me sound old- and lord knows I am not mature enough to be called a woman) that enjoys a social life and vegging out on the couch from time to time.

And really, if you don't enjoy a nice weekend of lounging in the same pajamas for 48 hours straight, you are not human, and I judge you.

So, with that said, I do wish I had written more during my vacation from running (which turned into a vacation from blogging as well). It is good to talk through these slow times and let other runners (or anyone with any hobby they may get tired of) know that IT HAPPENS, AND IT IS OK.

I think part of the reason I stopped running is that awful downward spiral my mind sets out on:
1) Shoot, I didn't run today- I will run tomorrow.
which turns into...
2) Damn, I didn't run yesterday, that throws off my whole week of training. I will start back up next week.
leading to the dreaded...
3) I am such a failure. It has been 2 weeks and suddenly my pants don't fit. Let's just eat another cookie and drink another beer and worry about it next week.
ending in the crash and burn of...
4) Forget it. It's been too long. I suck at running. I will need to start from scratch. Why even bother.

Yea, I know, my mind can be quite fantastical and catastrophic, right? What would you pay to be inside my head for just 5 minutes?! Would you even survive?! Be thankful for medication.

So my LESSON(s) LEARNED here, are:
-Stop being a drama queen and just get back out there and run. No matter how far, for how long, or how slow. Just run.
-It is ok to take some time off, hit the snooze button, eat some mac and cheese, and hang up the running shoes for a day... or two.
-When I feel out of it, talk about it and share it with others- not only will writing help me through it, but it will help others in a similar position.
-I do love running. A lot. It is a part of my life I will cherish forever. But just like I love shots of chilled tequila, sometimes you just need a break. And that's ok.

With that said, I am still learning to blog. Please hang in there with me. And enjoy the stories as I pull myself out of this slump.

I shall leave you with a picture from Thanksgiving. A few of my friends and I hung around Memphis rather than fight the travel insanity. We had a great time. I love my friends. (Note the scrumptious Tofurkey I made, front-left. And note that Thuy forgot to take the bag of gizzards out of the turkey's ass- HA!)

Cory, Thuy, me, Maureen, Eszter.
Thanksgiving portrait.

Chicago Race Report (FINALLY!)

I really reached a new level of RUDE, didn't I? I mean, 4 full weeks of going MIA, and I blame it on a book? I finished the book long ago, and still blew you off. Go ahead and delete me from your life, I don't blame you. But if you do, you will miss out on a whole lotta awesome.

SO THE RACE! YES! HERE WE GO! Get a snack, kick off your shoes, and get comfy, cuz I can tell you now, this will be nothing less than A LOT of reading. Too busy to read? Lots of neato pictures, too! But I surely make up for my absence with the length and content of this post.

Here we go...

I took the train to Chicago. THAT was an experience in itself. I took a train with my family from New York to New Mexico when I was, like, 16 years old. It was awesome cuz we got a sleeper car to ourselves. Oh, and I wasn't en-route to run a marathon. So needless to say, this was a very different experience. I left Memphis at 11pm, arrived in Chicago at 7am, and somehow managed to get a few hours of sleep along the way. All in all, it was a good experience, and I would surely do it again, but let's just remember that I have a curse and manage to attract the most insane people possible. And those people want to be my friend. I will leave it at that.

Some background- WHY did I pick the Chicago Marathon? MY BEST FRIEND EVER LIVES IN CHICAGO. Omar, my bff from Clemson, has lived up there for about 6 years, and I try to visit him as often as I can. So why not visit AND run a race, right? He ran it last year and I was in complete awe as I cheered him on. This year, my turn to run and his turn to cheer.

So I get off the train and he is there, all hugs and smiles and excitement! YAY!

Omar and his awesome pup, Oliver. Oli was so excited to see me, can't you tell?

Also, when I get off the train, I realize the weather warnings they were sending out were NO JOKE. Holy crap, it was FREEZING! Like, make your nose run, make your ears feel like they are going to snap off, make you wonder wtf is wrong with people who live in weather like this. (How I lived in Vermont for 10 years, I will never understand.) But then I remembered my runs in August in 150 degree weather, when I PROMISED myself I would NEVER EVER AGAIN complain about cold weather, and I immediately cut off all negative thoughts and began thanking Mother Nature.

Another friend of ours, Andrew, was running the race as well. It is his FIRST marathon, wahoo! We headed off meet up with him, and went on our merry way.

Expo, blah blah. Pre-race pasta dinner, blah blah. Pre-race Clemson victory, blah blah. Pre-race icing and stretching, blah blah. Get to the good stuff, Amy. PRE-RACE HOLY SMOKES I AM EXCITED.

There are 2 pre-race MUSTS in the world of a psychotic, neurotic, planning freak of nature like me...

2) Laying out my outfit the night before so it is ready the moment I wake up:

This isn't just your basic "pick a shirt, pick some shorts" ordeal. No, no. This is head to toe, top to bottom, everything that will be on my body in any way, shape, or form. Everything from my bib to my underwear to sunblock, it is laid out with the precision of a serial murderer that hasn't been caught in 30 years of criminal activity.

2) The perfect breakfast:

Before EVERY run, I MUST have the same thing. That way, I know my stomach won't explode, or even worse... ya know... POTTY ISSUES. Catch my drift? A little slow? Not understanding? Let me spell it out a little better: POOP. Got it? (Hey, it is a part of running. If you can't handle the poo talk, peace out.)
A) Emergen-C
B) Banana
C) Black coffee
D) Whole grain bread
E) Peanut or almond butter
Anything more, less, or different will result in a disaster beyond all belief. Don't ask how I know this. Just don't. Seriously.

I see you judging me and my neurotic behavior. And I am ok with it. I KNOW I am a freak. I embrace it. I have complete insight. The medication keeps me at bay, don't worry.

Alarm goes off at 4:30am and I am up like a shot, ready to go. Totally stoked. Couldn't contain myself. Worse than a 4 year old before their Dora the Explorer birthday party. I poop, I eat, I dress, I stretch, I put on my amazing jacket... oh, you forgot about the amazing jacket? Really? Well here is a reminder:

You didn't know I had a porn star mustache? 

The walk to the start line was awesome. It was a parade of racers, and you could feel the energy flowing: anticipation, excitement, fear... a sea of roller coaster emotions getting thrown around. I make my way to my start corral in a semi-dream-like state. It was a total blur. Like when I woke up from getting my wisdom teeth out and was acting comparable to a drug addict after a 9 day bender. For some reason, everything felt very surreal, and I didn't know how or what to feel. As I moved closer and closer to the start line, my mind remained completely blank. It was the strangest sensation.

Aaaannnnndddddd I cross the start line. Immediately, I am thrown into a sea of excitement. Runners, spectators, television cameras, bells ringing, posters and signs, balloons, music blasting... complete stimulus overload. I broke into a smile so big, and it didn't let up for the next 5 hours.

I didn't have my music playing or my headphones in yet, as I wanted to really soak it all up. I figured that after the first mile or 2, the spectators would thin out and I would go into the zone. PFFFTTT! Yea RIGHT! I am telling you this without any sarcasm (which for me, is a HUGE statement): the spectators lined both sides of the street for the ENTIRE 26.2 miles! It was like nothing I have ever experienced in my life. So many people- and they were cheering for all of us. Strangers supporting strangers. Excitement all around. It was... spectacular. With every corner I turned, I was continuously amazed at the support this city offered. It was beyond anything I could ever imagine, and the emotions overwhelmed me the entire time.

The weather was perfect. And I mean PERFECT. Not too cold, not too hot. I bid farewell to my pimpin' jacket at the start line, but I kept on my throw-away long sleeve under-shirt the entire time and was so comfortable. Rolled up the sleeves here and there when in the sun, but glad to have my arms covered in the shade. A slight breeze, and not a cloud in the sky. I couldn't have asked for better weather. Mother Nature, you da BOMB.

Heeeeey, sexy lady!

What, you thought I would take all normal pictures? Cmon, you know me better than that.

Free tickets to the Chicago Marathon Gun Show.

A few noteworthy sights:

-My favorite signs included "You are really good at exercise" and "Your elementary gym school teacher would be so proud". But seriously, there were so many, I lost track of favorites after about mile 3.

-I saw a blind man running.

-I saw a woman with 1 leg (and a blade prosthetic) running.

-When we passed a nursing home, the windows were filled with elderly folks waving and cheering.

As far as the actual running is concerned... dude, it was flawless! I felt great physically and mentally. My knees got a tiiiiiny bit sore around mile 10 or so, but nothing worth worrying about- mostly them just reminding me that I am an idiot for wanting to run 26 miles. I took it slow, walked through water stops every 3 miles or so, and really took care of myself. I did not have my Garmin with me, and I was not worried about pace or finish time- I just focused on soaking in the experience. I kept seeing random pace group leaders, but it mostly just confused me. I would see a 4:30 pacer from my start corral running in stride with a 5:30 pacer from the corral behind me. Um, what? Forget you guys, imma be my own pacer! Anyway, I felt awesome. At mile 23, out of nowhere, my left IT band threw up a white flag and said "screw you guys, I'm going home" all Kenny style, and started killing me. I stopped to stretch, and had to do this ever half mile or so, but pushed through the pain for the last 3 miles/ 30 minutes.

Really, I could go on and on, but words cannot do it justice. Seriously. I wish I could suck these feelings out of my soul and share them with you so you could understand just how amazing it was. It was easily a top 3 experience in my life, paling in comparison only to the birth of my niece. As I approached the finish line, I felt like I had conquered the world. I was like Leonardo DiCaprio on the front of the Titanic. Like Ariel when she got her legs. Like Harry Potter when he defeated Voldemort. Like Andy Dufresne when he fell out of the sewer pipe after escaping Shawshank. Get the picture? I mean, come on, LOOK AT ME:

All smiles across the finish line!

Couldn't be happier!

Baller.

A little 'tude gets you a LONG way. 26.2 miles, to be exact.

Thank you, Chicago!

Even just looking at the pictures, I am rejuvenated and my heart starts jumping and I get all creepy happy. It is xanax for the soul, I tell ya. I finished in 4:43, which is 45 MINUTES FASTER THAN LAST YEAR. I mean, yea, I was injured last year, but still, a 45 minute PR is above and beyond my wildest dreams. BEST 4 hours and 43 minutes EVERRRRRR.

Oh, and hey! Check out my bling, yo!

Selfie picture WHOO HOO!

To add to my wall-o-fame.

So the race ended, and I got my free post-race beer, got some free snacks (and promptly inhaled some Cape Cod potato chips, nom nom nom), went and got my bag from bag check-- all the while just floated around in this freakishly happy state. I called Kevin- it was so good to hear his voice and praise, I couldn't ask for a more supportive partner. I called my mom and we cried together. After about 15 minutes, this endorphin-high began to wear off and I realized I was FREEZING COLD. Luckily, Omar had tons of warm clothing for me. So I found him, bundled up, and talked a mile a minute about how awesome the race was.

Aimster and Marty!

Warm and proud.

We met up with Andrew (he kicked some major marathon ass as well, but I will save that for his guest post that he will be sharing soon!), and decided to head back to Omar's place to shower, stretch, get warm, and, the best part of running... THE POST RACE BINGE! What better way to celebrate the CHICAGO marathon than with the best pizza on earth- Giordano's!

This is what you eat in heaven.

Be still my heart... 

We've got the veggie delux pizza, a huge italian salad, bread sticks, and Omar's famous mojitos. Really, can you think of anything more satisfying after burning over 2,000 calories? I think I cried at some point during the meal, it was that amazing.

After our binge, we just lazied around as the soreness set in. On Sunday evening, the only thing that really hurt was the top of my foot/ bottom of my shin. Rather than ice it, I just kept my cold, pumpkin beer there. Better than a koozie, and a great way to multi-task.

Is it the cold or the alcohol that relieves the pain? Either way, it helped.

We went to bed around 9pm, and I don't even remember hitting the pillow. I was OUT. I woke up around 4am to pee, and promptly fell to the floor when I tried to stand up. Over night, my body had completely seized up and my legs decided to just stop working. It took me 10 minutes to make it the 15 feet to the bathroom. Let's not even talk about how hard it was to lower myself to the toilet seat (damn you, men, and your ability to pee while standing!)... then another 10 minutes to get back to bed.

We all got up around 7am on Monday and knew that the best thing for us was 1) another good meal, and 2) MOVING. As much as I wanted to lay on the couch in the fetal position, I knew it would be best if I keep in motion and try to loosen up my muscles.  So we headed out for an amazing breakfast (omelet with smoked gouda, potatoes and swiss chard... holy sweet Jesus) then down to Michigan Ave to do some touristy things. Wanna know the best way to shake off post-marathon soreness? Taking amazing jumping photos in front of the bean!

Then we took an hour long boat tour of the Chicago River. They talked about all of the architecture in the city, and we saw and learned some really neato stuff.  Best of all, we got a great view of the city from Lake Michigan.

Then it was time to get packed up for the train ride back to Memphis. Omar walked me to the train station- it never gets easier saying goodbye to your best friend. (Omar, we forgot to do the good-bye dance! Ahhhh!)

The train left Chicago at 8pm, and of course I get stuck next to some freak of nature that wanted to share her life story. So I kindly listened for 5 minutes, then put my headphones in, popped 2 tylenol PM, and passed out for the entire ride back to Memphis. I got in at 6am, Kevin picked me up, I melted into his arms, he brought me home, tucked me into bed, and I slept for another 4 hours.

When I woke up, I stayed curled up in bed for about 30 minutes reliving the whole experience in my mind. It was... life-changing. This event was above and beyond what I expected. It built a sense of confidence and accomplishment in my soul that I have never felt. I laid there, tears rolling down my face, happier than words can describe.

So there. The 2012 Chicago Marathon. In one word: EPIC.

FINISHERS!

Thank you to everyone that put up with my during training, and shared their love and support during the race. I love you all!

50 Shades of WTF

It has been OVER a week, and still no post-marathon entry?! How dare I keep you all on the edge of your seats like this. I am such a jerk. No fair.

WHY have I not posted? Well, my reason is pretty pathetic, actually.

I have gone to the dark side.

I am reading 50 Shades of Grey.

I KNOW!

This book is a complete smack in the face of all literature. An atrocity. A blow to the intelligence of any reader. A miserable piece of art, not worthy of publication or notice. Complete smut. Filth. Shakespeare is rolling over in his grave. Emerson and Thoreau are sobbing. Dr. Seuss and Shel Silverstein are wondering how the women that read their stories as children have grown to dabble in crap like this. C. S. Lewis is covering his ears with his hands and rocking back and forth. Lewis Carroll has come out of his drug-induced euphoria to just say "WTF?!" Hemingway is giving me the finger.

BUT DUDE, IT'S A COMPLETE PAGE-TURNER! I can't put it down. I am ashamed. I am less of a human being. I can't even look myself in the eye.

So at night and on the weekends, when I should be blogging, I have my nose stuck in this book learning more about Ana and Christian and their sexual escapades. I have 50 pages left, and will probably finish it tonight. Then I will have my life back, and will remember that running is more important than despicable porn books.

Spoiler alert

I WON THE CHICAGO MARATHON!

Had the time of my life. More details to come soon. Just wanted to let you all know that I won, and you can begin asking for autographs in person, via email, fax, or snail mail. A charge of $20 for each.

Chi-town Tonight

Hello? Are you there? Remember me? I KNOW, I suck at this blogging thing. I go MIA for a month and expect you to welcome me back with open arms? I am so arrogant.

Work has kept me ridiculously busy the past few weeks. It's not just diculous, it is REEEEE-diculous. Forgive me?

You SHOULD forgive me, because there are some EPIC posts to come! Why?

CHICAGO MARATHON IS THIS WEEKEND!!!!!! WHAT WHAAAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!

There are 3 that will ensure I win the race:

1) My nails! LOOK at this! Lightening bolt POWER! This is like, the ultimate turbo-booster. (Thank you, Maureen!)

2) My throw away jacket for the start line is hands-down the most amazing piece of clothing in the world. I got it at Goodwill for $3. There are no words...

3) I got good luck flowers from the #1 most wonderful boyfriend EVER. I pretty much adore him and love him to pieces.

These things PLUS the support of so many friends and family, PLUS great weather, PLUS the fantastic spectators, PLUS a playlist that will be the most unbelievable soundtrack possible... Yea, I'm going to win. Just keep your eyes peeled for my interview on the news. "So, Amy, how does it feel to WIN the Chicago Marathon?" I have my speech planned already.

Want some info on how to track me so you can know be ready to brag to all of your friends that you know the person that won the 2012 Chicago Marathon? Sure!

To get a full run-down of spectator information go HERE.

For those of you in TN, NC, and SC, I know most of you get the Chicago News on TV. I always wondered WHY, but for the first time ever, this random coverage geography is working to my advantage. You can watch the Chicago News (NBC, channel 5) for coverage of the race- and watch me cross the finish line first, waaaaaay before the Kenyans.

Probably the easiest and best way to stay up to date is by signing up to get texts, facebook updates, or twitter feed updates: sign up to do that HERE. It is REALLY EASY. (So Mom, you WILL be able to do this, I promise you. Just follow the directions.)

1) Go to that website.
2) Click REGISTER.
3) Type in your name and email, and make up some amazing password like AMYRUNSFAST or something.
4) Click CONTINUE.
5) To get text updates: Under "Tracking Methods", on the left, in green, you see a little bubble that says SMS. Next to that it says "Authorize". Click that button.
6) Put in your cell phone number and click OK.
7) You will get a text right away with an authentication number. Type that number into the little window that pops up on the website. Do it right away or else your submission will expire.
8) Click ok.
9) At the bottom of the screen, click NEXT.
10) Search for me either by NAME or BIB NUMBER (38488)
11) When my name pops up, click the little button next to my name, then hit SUBMIT.

DONE! Got it? Did it work? Sweet.

I have a twitter feed activated, so you can also follow me on twitter @amslearning2run

Bib number 38488, eh? I wish I had some cool way to decode that and make it significant, but I do not.  Here's to hoping it brings this superstitious freak some luck.

I am in corral J (which stands for JEEPERS CREEPERS, LOOK AT THAT HOT CHICK RUN!). That will put me starting somewhere around 8:10-8:30ish CST. I am not going to say what I expect my pace or finish time to be, because frankly, I have NO idea how it will go. Of course, hoping for the best and between a 10-11 minute pace throughout, but I am just going to play it smart, listen to my body, and soak up the experience.

Am I excited? YOU BET YOUR SWEET ASS I AM! I love the adrenaline rush, the anticipation, the butterflies in my tummy... this is the ONE time when I embrace my anxiety and just enjoy that feeling. What a rush!

Ummmmmmmmmm well... uhh... ok.... I guess.... that's it? Should we stand around and talk small talk for a little bit, or just hug goodbye and plan to have coffee next week to talk about the race?

...ok see ya.

CHICAGO HERE I COME!

What I've learned: #837

While Michael Phelps may make it look easy and an intricate part of winning 9 billion gold medals, I struggle with this simple concept:

Yesterday, I learned that it is a BAD idea to spit while running under the following circumstances:
-The wind is blowing in your face
-You are running uphill
-You are so dehydrated that your spit has the viscosity of maple syrup

Results include, but are not limited to:
-SPIT EVERYWHERE (in your hair, on your face, on your clothes) creating a spiderweb of yuck
-Bystanders pointing and laughing
-A suspicious stain on your black shirt

LESSON LEARNED.

The next big thing

I have been training for the Chicago Marathon since, what, February? Well, not really full out training, but maintaining and allowing time for a very slow, gradual, comfortable, injury-free build-up. I started with about a 10 mile base, and would space my long runs out fortnightly. I was conscious of vacations, trips, events, and anything else that could potentially get in the way of running. So, needless to say, marathon #2 has been on the forefront of my mind for a solid 7 months.

Today at work, someone asked me when my next big race is. In my head, I wanted to respond, "Oh I am doing the Chicago marathon, but that isn't for a while yet." But as I quickly did the math in my head, HOLY SCHNIKIES it is only 3 weeks away!

I have my hotel booked.
I have my train ticket booked.
I have planned my outfit (which is really the most important part of running, wouldn't you agree?).
I ran a 20 miler last weekend (which you will get the juicy update on later this week).
I have my recovery planned.
I have studied the course and have it imprinted in my mind. Ask me the name of the governor and I can't tell you, but ask me the name of the street mile 18.3 is on, and BAM, I gotcha. (It's Ashland Ave, btw.)
I even know what I will binge on post-race. 3 words: MAC N CHEESE. Yes, "N" is a word.

So I mean, it sounds like I am ready, right? RIGHT?!

RIGHT?!

Slow as molasses... or Tupelo honey...

Let's just cut right to the chase here... 97% HUMIDITY?! REALLY!? 

My interpretation of 97% humidity is "3% away from running at the bottom of the ocean while wearing an Eskimo outfit." It is uncanny how much the weather impacts my running.

The Tupelo race was just a 14.2 miler, which at this point should be no big shakes for me. But dear sweet Jesus above, it was pure agony. The 5am start time didn't scare me at first glance, but that was before I realized I would be up until 11pm cheering on my Clemson Tigers as they beat the pants off Auburn. OK, so late bedtime, that's ok. When my alarm went off at 3:30am, I was less than jazzed. I somehow made it to the start line around 4:30am and stretched and wiped the remaining eye boogers off my face. Then set out at 5am sharp.

I would have taken a picture of the start line to share with you, but it would pretty much would have just been a big black square. It was completely pitch black out. So dark. And silent. It was great once the pack thinned out a little- I really enjoyed the solitude and serenity of running through the back country roads of Tupelo with nothing but the near-full moon to light my way. But I was also aware that this was the perfect setting for a horror movie. A man with a chainsaw jumps out of the bushes and I am held captive in his basement for 4 months... you get the picture. Fortunately, that did not happen. (Though around mile 9 I would have preferred that.)

The first 6 miles were pretty good. I was holding at around a 9:30 pace and trucking right along. I saw some horses, skunks, and meth labs. It was great. But then, out of nowhere, SLAM. Wall. At mile 7. MILE 7?! REALLY?! Who hits a wall at mile 7?! No idea where that came from. My legs felt like cement. I was miserable. So slow. Had one mile in there that was well over an 11:30 pace. I will spare you any more play-by-play. Just picture me running, then use your fancy Blu-ray DVD player remote to put it in super-slow motion. Like the kind of slow motion that makes faces look all distorted and eyes all squinty, and makes any and all speech sound like a dying wildebeest. Or better yet, like Will Ferrell getting shot with a tranquilizer dart:

Yea. That was me. "I like you, but you're crazy..."

Somehow, I made it to the finish line. That was the only place the photographers caught me. Ummmm really? I look like that? Mother of pearl.... I AM SO DEAD SEXY! *sarcasm, for those of you that have yet to master my sense of humor*

I wasn't shooting for any records with this run, just wanted to get the cool medal. Which I did. And wore with pride.

Finished with a 10:08 pace (2:23:49). Not that great. But I didn't die. Or get kidnapped. For those 2 reasons alone, I will mark this one off as a "win."

Are you ready for the.... HURRICANE?!

Oh, Isaac. You silly hurricane. Thinking you're all cool as you blast the Gulf coast with rain and wind and similar shenanigans.

We are supposed to be getting the dwindling effects of Sir Isaac starting today here in Memphis. Thunder storms for 4 days. Honestly, I am kinda stoked. I love thunder storms. And I am hoping it will cool things off a bit, as the cool down we experience a few weeks ago was merely mother nature dangling a piece of chocolate in front of our faces, then yanking it away and pointing and laughing while she indulged. That tease.

Point of the story: I have a race in Tupelo, Mississippi this weekend, and it SHO LOOKS LIKE IMMA GET WET. This race is a bit.... unconventional. Tie-dye shirts, scull medals, and an undercurrent of humor and jest that I greatly appreciate in the running world. The Tupelo Marathon and 14.2 miler is a very small, local, friendly race. Immediately after registering back in May, the race director shot me an email to "welcome" me to the race, and to wish me a happy birthday. Them Tupelo folk sure is kind!

All this Isaac crap got me a little worried the race would be cancelled due to flying trees and flooded roads. This was on the race website this morning, and I laughed VERY hard:

Hysterical. If there is one thing I appreciate, it is a sarcastic, smart-ass sense of humor. It almost makes running in the miserable ran that much more fun. Ok, not really, but whatever.

Pizza party

I went out to this huge farmer's market last weekend and, among other amazing items, I got a giant bunch of arugula. I have been adding it to pasta dishes, omelets, and sandwiches all week long, but the bunch doesn't seem to be getting any smaller! So a few nights ago, I decided to indulge my incessant pizza craving in order to use up the remaining arugula.

Boom.

I was lazy and just didn't have the time to make my own dough, so crust-in-a-tube had to due this time around. What else do we have here?
Basil pesto
Garlic
Mushrooms
Roma tomatoes
Red onion
Arugula
Part-skim mozzarella

It was spectacular, and I am really patting myself on the back for this amazing flavor profile. Arugula has such a unique taste that many people dislike at first exposure, but it is so versatile and deserves a 2nd chance. It adds such a distinct, peppery bite to any food. And so many wonderful nutrients- tons of Vit C and Potassium!

Three cheers for ARUGULA!

Hmmmm, but something is missing, what can it be??

OF COURSE, WINE! Add an episode of Snooki and JWoww, and I am one happy camper. Cheers!

When the stars align...

I will admit- I was in a rut. 

The past month or so, I have been less than excited to lace up my shoes and set out for a run, no matter the distance. Was it the unbearable heat just finally winning our epic battle? Perhaps. Whatever the case may have been, running slipped to the bottom of my list of priorities- even below folding laundry and washing floors. Yikes!

This past Saturday, my training plan had me running 18 miles. But I was realistic with my expectations and would be fine if I made it at least 13. Having not been on a long run (anything over 6 miles) in nearly 4 weeks + dental surgery + excruciating heat, I did not want to push myself and end up hurt.

But then I saw the weather report for Saturday.

And then my mouth magically stopped hurting.

So when I woke up on Saturday morning at 5:30am, I was strangely optimistic.

I am telling you, the stars were aligned. Everything was perfect. The weather was mild, slightly overcast so the sun wasn't frying my skin off. A slight breeze keeping me cool and bringing that lovely diaper smell of the Mississippi River across the land. I felt amazing, both mentally and physically. Everything just fell into place.

I did a 9 mile loop back to my house, refilled my water bottles, downed a Honey Stinger, and set out for a few more miles, having no definite direction or distance in mind.

Dude. Check it.

DAMN! That is one sexy wrist... OH, right, the mileage, that's cool too.

No, I did not hold a 9:40 pace the whole 18 miles. Who do you think I am? A damn roadrunner?! I averaged about a 10:40 pace, which I am totally fine with. I picked up the pace those last .2 miles when I could finally see my front door and knew I wasn't going to die on the side of the road and never be found. I was excited.

This is why I'm hot.

I only have a stall shower, so I cannot take an ice bath after long runs. So I improvise. Ice pack wrapped on 1 knee. And, why yes, that IS the ceramic insert to my crockpot that I am soaking my feet in! Can't say I'm not innovative. (YES, I washed it! Don't be afraid you will get a toenail in your food the next time you come over for dinner. Besides, I don't even HAVE toenails anymore after all this long-distance running, duh.)

This is exactly what I needed to pull myself out of that RUT. Not the ice bath, the run. The ice bath is torture. But the run, THAT WAS EPIC. I know running isn't completely a "use it or lose" it practice, but I still tend to panic even if I miss one training run. Something comes up, I miss a mid-week 4 miler, and it's all "I'M NEVER GOING TO MAKE IT 26 MILES! I MAY AS WELL QUIT NOW! I HAVE TO START FROM SCRATCH! I AM A FAILURE" No. That is just my fantstical mind being stupid, once again.

7 weeks till Chicago. B-b-b-b-b-b-b-bring it.

I gotta show you this...

You ready for this? Drum roll please.....

Thank you, isolated t-storms. You are my new bff.

Would you LOOK AT THAT?! It is going to be less than 110 degrees in Memphis this weekend! Ya know what THAT means? I don't have to wake up at 4am for my long run tomorrow morning!

Yup. I just did the Carlton Dance...

Gimmie muh teef! Excuse #285

The day after I got back from San Fran (which I will tell you aaaaall about in a later post), I had the joy of getting my wisdom teeth out!! Whoohoo!!!! Doesn't that sound like the most amazing "welcome home" present ever?! Trying to convince myself it was a blast by using excessive exclamation points!

The procedure itself went pretty well. I had never been under anesthesia before, so this was quite the trip for me. They stuck the needle in my arm and said, "Ok, now just relax...." The next thing I remember, I woke up on Kevin's recliner 4 hours later in a puddle of drool. I have a cloudy memory in there of them waking me up- I demanded to see my extracted teeth, then got belligerent when they would not let me keep them. Because of course, everyone wants to keep their bloody, rotten, cracked wisdom teeth, right? Make a necklace out of them? Put them in a scrapbook or shadowbox? Who do they think they are! Gimmie muh teef!

More often than not, I try to abide by the "shut up and run" motto, not letting the plethora of excuses persuade me to lay on the couch with a box of Cheez-Its and watch 4 episodes of LOST rather than venture out for a run. But yesterday, I am sorry, I just couldn't do it. We all have our limits, and this wimpy gal couldn't fathom putting on running shoes while my entire face was throbbing. Also, my limited diet of mashed potatoes and soup has left me feeling a bit empty. So I did indeed go home, curled up with a nice bowl of pudding, and watched TV... for 5 hours. Booyah.

Today, no excuses...

Westward expansion

Do you know how many songs there are about California? A lot, that's how many. I am listening to them all today in anticipation of my long-awaited journey to the West coast. I have been to New Mexico and Colorado, but never far enough West to dip my toes in the Pacific Ocean or look out and pretend I can see Japan. Tomorrow I am heading out to San Fran and Napa for a college friend's wedding, and I AM SO EXCITED OH MY GOD I CAN'T SIT STILL ANY LONGER THIS IS BETTER THAN CHRISTMAS! I am going to make the most out of ever... single... second.

Picture it: 3 days of college friends, wine country, perfect weather, and a new city to explore. Ya can't beat it.

This runner is stuck in the 1990's (is it sad that is considered "a long time ago" now?!) and doesn't have a smart phone OR an iPad, so no updates while I am gone. But I will surely share pictures and stories upon my return!

That's my jam, yo! Alex Clare- Too Close

Thank you, Internet Explorer commercial, for the latest addition to my running playlist. If this beat doesn't pump you up, I don't know what will.



Alex Clare's first album, The Lateness of the Hour, is pretty decent as a whole. Very eclectic. Definitely not all running-playlist worthy, but a good find nonetheless.

Sweat Your Thorns Off 5k

Let's just jump right in with a race report. Why waste time with the boring get-to-know-you chit-chat. It is only our 1st date, we have plenty of time to get to those details.

This past Saturday was the 3rd Annual Sweat Your Thorns Off 5k- a "virtual" 5k hosted by one of my favorite bloggers, The Boring Runner. (Note, you know you are an official running nerd when you begin taking part in virtual races. I am one step away from the runners version of World of Warcraft.) So as part of my long training run on Saturday morning, I dedicated the 1st 3.1 miles to Adam and his toasty event.

Straight reppin' Memphis, Tennessee! 

Please remember that the only time it is ok to be a white girl dropping a lame gang sign like this on Riverfront Park in Memphis is at 6am on a Saturday. Any other time you will be shot. But I embraced my gangsta side (and put on some Three 6 Mafia) to add some Memphis spice to this race.

I sure did sweat my thorns off with this slow 30 minute 5k... A nice mild 89 degrees and 85% humidity at 6am- quite chilly for Memphis in August, right?

Dear Winter- I promise I will never curse you again. I miss you. I love you. Please come back soon. Love, Amy Mary